Thursday 28th April

So off to the library it is. Get blown off track on the way as the wind is fierce but I was surrounded by flying petals so it seemed somewhat more poetic than it actually was. I've decided on a library routine. Six books max, three english classics, one america, one lighthearted or contemporary and one no-fiction of an area that interests me (a book on chaos theory was this week's choice). As Shane and I have decided to learn French I also grabbed an 'Introducing French CD pack. Ooh la la. (The cheeky bastard has been sneakily learning it on his walkman to get ahead of me ever since.)

Off to Boots (pharmacy) for new shampoo as Pantene is the worst product ever devised and I cannot bear it any longer. Without understanding a word of the cashier I somehow managed to leave the store with a membership card and my purchase for half price.

Head to the netcafe and on a whim look up comics conventions and find there's one on this weekend including Spike, Giles and Wesley from Buffy about an hour out of London which I will make my best efforts to attend. The comiccon is also in a month and will be held 5 mins walk from my house. How bloody exciting.

Also have an email from a job I applied for asking me to meet with them at 5pm tomorrow. If the woman had offered anymore information than merely that request I might have been able to make it, but as it is I think I best call her next week and try and reschedule.

Get an unexpected call from Australia from a budding filmmaker who I shall be proud to know one day apparently.

Then I just read, read, read and already finish one of my library books (Diary of a Nobody - much like this in fact) which puts me in mind that if I ever find that old lady's time machine I'll go back to her time, ride about on penny farthings and write famous classics, directly ripped of from their authors before they get the chance. Jane Eyre shall be my first being the most read book in the universe and aptly was penned under a fake name so Charlotte Bronte will never suspect *evil laugh*.

Anyway it's now 10:30pm, I could have sworn it was midnight and I have a doco on the Bermuda Triangle to watch.

So I bid you adieu.

Wednesday 27th April

Early rise and I'm quite excited about working. However Shane is in the bathroom fussing over his bloody eye so I have to change my schedule a bit. (That night when Shane got home he says to me 'it's a bit of a worry how much time I spend on my eye, I've only just realised' where I assured him it wasn't just a bit of a worry, it was downright disturbing.)

Jump on the overcrowded bus where I got jammed by the doors more than once. What fun. Alight at Chelsea Harbour, a weird little place which seems wrong in London. A large complex resembling a small island on the map which would be more at home on the Gold Coast. In fact, it reminded me quite a lot of Marina Mirage (or is that in Port Douglas? Meh, they're all the same.) Apparently Michael Caine lives at this one.

Upon entering my building I thought I'd fallen through time about 4 years. Arriving as a temp, in an events management company, who this very day was rebranding to their new name change. Precisely how I arrived on the steps of Jack Morton. I was even met by one of the most breathtaking women I've ever seen, much like at Jack (you know who you are). Anyway, the only reason I knew I was still in the present day is because their offices were about 10 times better than ours.

At first I thought I'd come for nothing. There seemed some confusion as, overnight, some office fairy had done the work I was supposed to do. But no, there was plenty of work. Owing to the namechange the 100 or so employees were to receive gift boxes. My job was to assemble said gift boxes, ensure each was specifically tailored to its receiver, by way of shirt sizes and business cards and a dozen little other things. I was actually quite hard work and myself and a few helpers who breezed in and out throughout the day didn't knock off until 7. (Interesting note on this, at one point someone offered the help of a New Zealand boy but the leader of the proceedings decided it would be dangerous to have an Australian and New Zealander in the room. Hmm.)

Despite killing my back I did have some fun and it was really nice to be in a busy office again. So I left my CV, said goodbye to my new acquaintances who replied that they hoped to see me again (I know most people would say that but it felt good nonetheless) and headed home in the sun to arrive in the rain. While Melbourne has four seasons in one day, London (sometimes) has four seasons five times a day.

Went to bed excited because tomorrow is library day and on Monday I can complete my DVD collection to present satisfatcion with Press Gang Seasons 3 & 4 and Garden State. Can't wait.

Tuesday 26th April

This morning I finished off Tim Winton's Cloudstreet, a book that will certainly stay in my head for awhile and dress myself proper like for today's agency interview. (The one from the previous day, despite her promises, never called.) This one is in Soho, flanked by Oxford and Regent Streets; shopper's paradise, but as I hate to shop, I'd prefer to avoid this area where possible (also home to all the video production companies so in other ways, I'd like to be there all the time).

Met with a walking contradiction, she was overconfident yet clearly self concious, caring yet clearly couldn't give a shit. This all lasted about 10 minutes whereupon I wandered about in the rain and looked at some toy shops.

By the time I walked to Picadilly Circus the sun was beaming down so I snuck a quick shot of the statue of Eros (My last one was quite good but not great. Naturally a bird flew past precisely as I took it and ruined this one too.) As I walked in the door back home, this same agency was calling back with a job for tomorrow. Hooray. My first in under a year.

I decided I'd best get a national insurance number (a total catch 22, some places won't employ you without one, but you need to have proof of work to get one) so after ringing and being directed all about the place, I finally *hopefully* get the numbers I need. People said it would be hard and it really is. I rang and rang and rang. I even tried them at 11pm and they were STILL engaged so I reckon they just leave the phones off the hook. If anyone knows a trick to this, please lemme know.

Walk to Sainsburys in the rain and freezing cold to do a spot of shopping. Then bed. Why is it when you need sleep the most it just won't come? When I did finally sleep I kept dreaming I'd missed work tomorrow. Don't you just hate the predictability of yourself sometimes.


By the way, one of the Channel 4 promos I mentioned may be here...
http://www.channel4.com/ads/index1.html
but this netcafe seems to be struggling loading whatever it is. Lemme know.

Monday 25th April

I keep getting these bizarre hunger pains, about 3 times more intense which cannot be sated by actual eating. So this morning I go on a random mission in search of food and phone credit. Luckily the bakery does great chicken rolls.

Apply for a few more jobs and then tube it to East Putney for my agency interview. If the previous agency was hell, this was heaven by contrast (trust hell to have the better office). They're primarily going to find me temporary reception work (one of which I'll find out about tomorrow morning) and where possible, place me in TV or production companies. Hoorah.

On the way home I see a lovely old lady feeding the pigeons, in complete contrast to the time-travelling bus witch from yesterday. I also have another interview lined up for tomorrow with a company who's primary focus is the media industry.

Upon getting home I reread the reference Caroline wrote me a year ago and it truly is the nicest thing someone could ever write about another person and almost made me cry again.

Incidentally, Channel 4 here (their promo team deserves amedal) is running an ad at the moment (similiar to another they've made a couple o years back which I saw over the web in Australia involving a bunch of celebrities swearing) where more celebrities (including the wonderful Zach Braff) talk about the last time they cried. I don't know why but I think about it often. I'll see if I can find a link, but if not, and you can manage to track it down it's definitely worth checking out. Haha, I just found a website totally dissing it. Anyway, I can't find it, but if anyone cares enough their website is www.channel4.com.

Sunday 24th April

This morning Shane had volunteered us to attend a meeting of a friend of his regarding being a part of whatever pyramid scheme is the fashion these days. I had to flatly refuse as I value my friendships far too much to be loading shoddy goods off on you all.

After this the three of us were required to go on a merry excursion to investigate our possible new abode. However, Shane, the slacker, puts it off until he has to go to work and forces Craig and I to investigate on our own. Keep in mind dear people I've said about 20 words to Craig in my five weeks here so I think both of us were equally resistant to this suggestion but necessity overruled our personal disgruntlement.

What had been sold to us as a 10 minute tube ride, actually became 2 bus trips and a 10 minute walk. However, at least I have some inkling now how the buses work. Much like the tube system overcrowding is the rule.

In the last year or so I've been having a number of dreams, usually varied, however with a recurring setting. For a moment during our journey I believed I'd found it, or a part of it, as the dreamplace is probably as big as a suburb. I'm not so convinced now but for a second there I was a little shaken. In explanation, it was a large roundabout, admittedly the prettiest roundabout I've ever seen in the world (a hill covered with tulips), with 4 or 5 exits, one leading under a bridge, edged by period buildings and a cherry tree.

Anyway, I digress. We reach our destination and stand staring at it for 20 minutes while waiting for the owner to answer his phone. Whatever hope I harboured at this point ran for the hills. For anyone who's familiar with "the projects" in Melbourne, you will understand the kind of building we were looking at. A building high as the sky, long, yet narrow with about 500 windows, crammed with immigrants etc etc. Here they are called "estates". The building was filthy and I was a little scared to say the least.

The apartment itself was rather nice and certainly what we are looking for but I couldn't help but feel disappointed.

On the way home, I gave my seat to a little old lady who whinged loudly for all the bus to hear, how migrants were overtaking the country. I wondered if she'd just stepped from a time machine from 100 years ago.

Anyway, I've no idea if we're going to take this place or not. From what I gather, this is how things work around here. Shane rings his mum with his opinion. In the meantime she, on the sly, rings Craig at work for his opinion and then reports back to either party. All the questions I ask are ignored until I overhear Shane speaking with his mother and explaining in full details to her the answers I require. Yes, frustrating.

I've decided I'm already quite fond of Earls Court and should probably just get my own place when I have the cash.

Saturday 23rd April

Woke up, still buggered, went back to sleep till midday. Washed clothes, observed with disdain the laundry attendant perving on all the women's clothes, played SIMS (nearly finished it) and took a brief late stroll to the shops for sustenance.

Friday 22nd April

Despite at least seven hours of sleep I woke up today feeling utterly exhausted, with bags under the bags under my eyes so I cancelled all today's plans (of which there were close to none) and played the Sims (Urbz) on Playstation, with a longish nap in the latter part of the day.

The last few days have really been boring as hell and not included very much activity so I apologise for my tedious rantings.

Thursday 21st April

Well I'm writing this many days since, and unprepared (I normally note everything down in a travel diary before I commit it to binary code) as I really felt I should add something, having been awhile since I last contributed.

My parents called me in the morning and reassured me about not taking dubious soul destroying positions which made me feel considerably better about the previous goings on. I believe on this day I was very much enthralled with Jane Eyre, and found great difficulty in pulling myself away. I called a couple of recruitment agencies in the afternoon and teeed (how the hell do you spell this) up an interview with one for Monday afternoon (which in fact, is today). I made sure to express my disdain for any call centre work in advance.

Bit of a net trip, video store trip and purchasing of KFC chips followed. Can you BELIEVE they don't salt the chips here?

Wednesday 20th April Part 2

RETURNED - One missing soul.

Well 6 o'clock came and went and my phone did not ring and I felt great. In retrospect this was the best possible outcome and whatever conspired these events obviously had something else in store. So now I'm not forced into a position I don't want, I don't feel bad for what I might have lost by not accepting it, I don't look entirely bad to the agency as I didn't turn down the offer, although I won't ever trust them again, and it shows that lying simply doesn't triumph. I don't feel entirely like a failure as in simple truth I don't have sales or phone experience (and fully never intend to have any) and obviously this showed. HOWEVER, now I feel like a horrible whinger for not being grateful and not wanting to help charities. There's just no winning this Hayley game.

With that in mind I spend my night with Jane Eyre.

On another note entirely, Shane appears to have found us a house, which was much needed as Craig is going to Australia soon and bringing their father back, and it would not do to house us all in that tiny room. It's 10 mins more south than where we are, has new furniture, 3 rooms, 2 bathrooms, and a view, for roughly £400 pound each a month. Which is incredulous in Australian terms but is a relatively good price on London soil. Fingers crossed that all goes well there.

Wednesday 20th April

The true evil begins at being forced to get up at 7. A regular thing for most people I'm sure but for me it's a horrible injustice not being used to it in quite awhile. Then the evil tube with daggers for teeth and fire for breath crams me onto it in positions the human body just doesn't like to be shaped in.

At the agency I wait 30 mins am am met by the devil himself who decides to conduct the interview whilst walking down a hallway. With no chance to put forward what I actually WANT to do, as I expected, I'm told there's a position, in a call centre doing outbound calls for charity. At this point my resistance to such an evil kicks in but alas, the devil takes my leave and in enters one of his minions. It becomes clear at this point that I've no longer got a choice in the matter and no chance to back out, and before I know it I've got a phone interview booked for the very same afternoon. Suddenly hell spits me out and I'm standing on the street trying to figure out what's just happened.

Disoriented I stumble to Trafalgar Square and stand drinking it in while contemplating all the lies I've been told to tell in the interview. Including one I noticed in my notebook a few hours later saying 'I'm passionate about call centre work'. So essentially this is the situation...

I've been asked to lie about my experience, lie about my personality, lie about being passionate about telesales, all to get a job I do not want involving two of my least favourite occupations, speaking on the phone AND selling to people who don't want what I'm offering in the first place, involving taking the sympathy angle. I hate lying and I don't do it well and lying for something I don't even want just becomes too much to bear. So putting all this aside, I decide to walk.

At first I walk through the beautiful St James Park, watching the ducks and oh so cute squirrels and smelling the gorgeous scent of the flowers that line the way. Then I'm at Buckingham Palace watching the changing of the guard which basically involves lots of marching, marching bands, marching guards, police showing off like they're kings and queens of the world. While the real Queen sits so very close. Then everyone stands around foran excrutiating 40 minutes or so until off they march again.

After this I walk to Big Ben and the Houses of Parliament. Then to Westminster Abbey (my god, what a great building). I don't go in as it costs too much but I go into St Margarets next door which is um, churchlike, as you would expect. I didn't find my newly stolen soul there as I'd hoped.

Then I walk to some other stunning building, I've no idea what it was - St John's Concert Hall perhaps. Then off to Number 10 Downing Street, which is no longer open to the public but I figure there's no souls to be found there anyway. Then to some other place, Cenotaph? All the while being very tourist like and trying to immortalise every piece of beauty forever. But feeling empty still and trying to weigh up a choice I have no desire to be faced with, I head home.

I walk Shane to work, ring Joel for advice (sorry dear I ran out of credit) and now I'm sitting here deciding if I should call and refuse to take this interview, all this while feeling even more empty because the goddamn job from hell is for charity.

Oh what I'd give for the ability to make decisions. Instead my stupid thought process has to be, what will I lose if I don't do it, or what horrible hangup will I develop if I do.

Right, so I just did the phone interview thinking I might still be able to back out even if that went well. There was a bunch of questions I wasn't prepared for that I basically stuffed up, which I can't help but feel is a good thing, considering the drivel of lies that came out of my mouth. I should hear by 6pm. At this point I'll either cry because they want to meet me in person or I'll cry because I failed at impressing them even if I didn't want to.

So anyway, as it is still Wednesday, if anything exciting happens, I'll make a Wednesday Part 2 and let you know, but I was just so keen to share this with you and plead with whatever readers are reading for their opinion on what I should do. PLEASE LET ME KNOW.

Much love.

Tuesday 19th April

Today is rather busier than I expected. Head to the internet for a number of hours, looking at jobs and updating my resume. Whilst this was going on it seems an evil scheme was working against me which I'll explain in more detail a little later.

Then off to Sainsburys where unbelievably the cashier packed all my 4 bags for me and stared at me the whole time he did it, as if to say, is my packing alright for you? Was most unnerving.

Back home, I realise there's a message from one of the recruitment agencies (the stupid one I signed with at the recruitment show) to call them. Which I did, and was asked to come to an interview on Wednesday at 9am. Oh, by the way, my pin number finally arrived today, hooray! Hence the newfound cash. Anyway, so back to the netcafe I go to print out my CV and apply for about 7 jobs.

This may all seem really boring, but it's all background to this evil scheme which comes into effect on Wednesday.

Monday 18th April

Not a lot on the cards today. Watch a movie, get our photos developed (and expensive "process") and read a couple of local magazines. The bank still has not sent me my pin number so I don't have any money, damn them.

A friend of Shane's is looking for someone to work for their recruitment company which Shane has put me forward for, however upon checking it at the netcafe, it's far too sales focussed which is about the last thing I ever intend to do with my life, unfortunate, but oh well.

I'm reading a book about Greek Mythology and its more surprising than I expected how many stories the bible has ripped off and claimed as absolute truth.

Sunday 17th April

With Shane's love of fish, today we decide to go to the Aquarium. I can't say it's the best I've ever been to but it's fun nonetheless. I get to touch a stringray and decide I like them immensely and also see the scariest creature I've ever seen in my life. It was a big fat lime green eel about 2 metres long, and thicker than both my legs together, with a head like a snake. My God! I couldn't believe it was real. I wouldn't go anywhere near the tank due to the horror of it all, but I took some photos if anyone ever wants to see it.

In the gift shop I find my sought after Pez dispenser and we muck around with the toys for a bit while I convince Shane to go on the London eye. For those who may not know, the London Eye is like a big ferris wheel that takes about 20 mins to go around once, so you can see the whole city. (It also takes about this long to buy a ticket for it). I took about 50 photos and decide to go on it again one night time when I have a better camera as it would just be insanely beautiful.

On the way home we pick up the Playstation version of the Atari games (never get it, it's terrible) and then eat pizza and watch a four hour show on the best 100 albums of all time as voted by Brits. They're an odd bunch. Radiohead's OK Computer won. But how is it possible that Oasis beat the Beatles, that bands like Pearl Jam, Metallica (god forbid but they do deserve a place), ACDC, the Ramones, a good deal of the Manchester Electronica scene and countless others were left out completely!

Saturday 16th April

I'm really getting the shits with this website. Half the time when you press the post button, the link fails and you have to type it all out again. GODDAMN YOU.

For the second time....

In that all important last third of my book today so I spend all day reading. I finish Great Expectations and read all of the Hound of the Baskervilles and still manage to fit in a few hours of TV including a great documentary on Uccello's Battle of San Romano masterpieces. There is such pure humble joy in spending the day reading a book accompanied by numerous cups of tea. I tell you, I do not miss the internet one bit at this point.

Around dusk, perhaps inspired by all this reading, I become reflective about all the culture and history surrounding this country. Without even leaving the house I am really moved by the art and architecture and history that is virtually non existant in Australia, although as a consolation, and what really makes us the lucky country, is we don't have a comparable history of torment and bloodshed and war, at least not on our terms. I also think a lot about the monarchy and their effect on the world. You can't walk the streets here without breathing all this in and being encompassed by the thought of all the stories you'd hear if inanimate objects could talk.

Friday 15th April

Today I'm off to the bank to deposit my millions in my newly opened bank account. They've already sent me about 5 letters each one saying there's another letter coming with the vital information I'm waiting on. Aren't banks great!!! Then I pay a visit to the stationers and notice an ad in the window for positions available. This seems like dangerous territory to me but this was exactly my thought process (a. but I don't know anything about selling stationery b. OH MY GOD, I love stationery, how could I ever stop playing with it and buying things!)

Next stop my beautiful laundrette, for my seemingly endless washing and never quite drying venture. After this I go home to try and work myself up to going to the netcafe. The problem here is, I actually want to go today but for some reason I'm so used to not wanting to go that I start inventing reasons to delay my visit until I realise I'm a complete idiot and should just go. And go I do, saying a silent hello to my familiar strangers as I walk in.

Man, there's this psychic on the tv at the moment who's totally freaking me out. I wouldn't be buying into it at all except he's tricking that comedian I love, Simon Pegg. Dear me. This is really becoming a very long entry for having done nothing of interest all day.

So anyway, I just came home and I'm finally really fired up about finding a job. Without realising, I've totally glossed over any office experience I've had in my CV so I've just updated it and realised some of the crap I've done and started wondering why the hell I'm being so damn precious. So I'm going to list myself with about 6 or 7 agencies next week. (Is this too many?)

Thursday 14th April

I've been waiting for this day basically since I arrived. It's the day of the TNT Recruitment Show. (For those who don't know TNT is the magazine for 'antipodeans' which by their definition is Australians, New Zealanders and South Africans.) As I write this Shane is attacking me with the removable fur bit from one of his jackets like its a snake, although I'm more scared of it because it looks like a ferret.

Anyway, so I head off to the show, attend some seminars - one on careers in film and theatre (the theatre bit was informative if that were my field, the film bit is unfortunately particularly useless) and one on sales and marketing which is totally useless as I just don't get marketing. It just seems so broad and undefined.

Then I walk through the stands grabbing information about most of the recruitment agencies before I decide who to list with, although I do get co-erced into signing up with the least appropriate agency I can find. Then I hang around for another hour waiting for the talk on CVs and interview preparation only to find the room is completely packed so I give it a miss.

Head off to Gosh Comics instead where just to prove me wrong the sales assistant is not on the phone whinging about his hangover. I feel compelled to buy something so I grab a book about Neil Gaiman (yet another book to read!) which inspisres the girl in line after me to buy it also despite already having spent £90 on comics. Then off home.

Shane is home from work early due to his eye giving him grief again (this really is a serious problem). And tonight we watch a great new show which is like antiques roadshow for 20th century collectibles. Very cool and gives me a few ideas. And then Spellbound was on so I finally got to see it.

I might add here how great the reality TV is. Unlike trying to make celebrities out of nobodies they're really quite useful ie. inexpensive makeovers of failing shops, how to look 10 years younger in a week, how to change your spending and eating habits. Blah blah. There is a little too many of them taking up valuable movie time (most don't start till sometime after 11) but they are really quite interesting and a much better alternative to the multitude of shit english dramas.

Wednesday 13th April

Don't do very much today beyond the internet cafe where I make up stuff to look up because I can't be bothered going home due to all the lightbulbs having blown. One was only replaced four days ago (!) and since the ceiling is so high, I can't reach them to change them. Wasn't that a useless piece of information to relay to you all.

I won't bore you any further with the minor details of today. Although it did end with a glass of champagne but even how that came about is rather boring.

Then I dreamt I lived with Seth Green and he just kind of annoyed me but he ended up taking me to the prom where I wore a wedding dress and exclaimed it looked too goth.

Bizarre.

Tuesday 12th April

I've pretty much decided not to do a whole lot this week for no reason really, except I don't feel like it. Today I go to the shops to buy cous cous (as you do) and attempt to buy a Pez dispenser a. because I've never had one or even tasted one and b. because I want to play a joke on Shane based on the Seinfeld Pez episode but they don't have any so that idea goes out the window.

The whole time I'm at the shops I'm trying to Where's Wally my familiar strangers but to no avail, but whadoyaknow, as I'm leaving they're walking in and I can't help but laugh out loud.

Then I play GTA for the rest of the day and finally finish it so that's one less object of procrastination to while my time away. Whatever shall I do now.

Someone give me a job.

Monday 11th April

I wake up this morning after a night of horrible dreams literally crying. (I blame the dreams on not reading the very last chapter of Catch 22 before I went to sleep but I really can't be sure). Muck about all day. Go to the internet place for an hour or two.

Oh! I must tell you about my familiar strangers. They're this couple - the guy is absolutely incredible, the girl, well, isn't and they're everywhere I go. Always at the shop, or walking down the street, or without fail in the net place whenever I'm there. And it's weird because everytime they spot me in the netcafe they always react like 'there's that girl again' but whenever I see them anywhere else they show no sign of recognition at all. Perhaps I'm just totally paranoid.

Am now onto reading 'Great Expectations' and wondering why I haven't read it before.

Sun 10 April

Joel has emailed Shane and I a mission and surprise surprise Shane is up for it. I exclaim leaving the house 'I can't believe we're out of the house' to which he replies 'you say that everytime' which is our usual conversation whenever we venture out.

We take a stroll up Regent Street, drop into Hamleys (a 5-7 floor toy shop which isn't quite as great as it sounded but still good nonetheless). I take a couple of photos of life size lego figures and co-erce Shane into walking down the Harry Potter themed staircase much to his utter humiliation. I rather liked it though. Then after walking up and down Regent Street looking for where we're supposed to be we finally find it. It's a place called Playlounge which sells quirky toys much to my liking. It's about 4 times smaller than I pictured it.

I SWEAR everytime I go into a comic or specialty toy store the shop attendant is ALWAYS on the phone with some friend of theirs complaining about the hangover they have from the night before. Everytime! They're such a stereotype.

Anyway, I can't really spend money yet until I get a job so I don't. Shane is all sooky cos he has got something in his eye for like the 100th time this week so we go home and watch his new Seinfeld DVDs. Yes, more DVDs but as I'm trying not to spend too much I think it's totally justified. Damn you all! :)

Saturday 9th April

Another day of boring tasks. First the internet, then shopping, then washing. I have a few momentary lapses in my otherwise cheerful mood because nothing in the shop is right. Tomato paste is called tomato puree, thai ingredients are impossible to find, pumpkin is frowned upon and doesn't exist in soup form, mince tastes like shit, bacon isn't precooked, the list goes on and on. So I figure I'll need to work on my pre-conceived preciousness when it comes to shopping here.

I hassle Shane to do something tonight but to no avail so instead we have a couple of pre-canned Pimms, one of which I manage to kick all over the floor (how some things never change) and I cheer for everything being done for the next few days.

Friday April 8

Leaving the house today was much more difficult than usual due to my discontent the previous day but the ticket man at the Tube was nice to me so I felt all shades of better. Then on my Tube changeover on my way to Tate Britain I am accosted (I just discovered this word can mean solicit for sex funnily enough) again by these strange pariahs who latch onto innocent women. This one decides hes going to tag along with me for the day even though I didnt even tell him where I was going. I tell him this is a stupid idea so he tries to get my number. I tell him I dont know mine and he tells me he doesn't know his (and Im thinking - I know this trick buddy, Ive got YOUR number - thank you cynical voice for not disappearing this time) so he organises to meet me at the exact spot that same night to go to a 'disco'. On my way home I purposely avoid this station altogether, despite it taking me a number of stations out of the way, because these scary men are beginning to get to me.

So ANYWAY at the stop for Tate Britain I get lost (as usual) partly because I'm stupid and partly because Im afraid scary man is trailing me. The Gallery is rather nice, as galleries go. Lots to look at, as one would expect. I think the most famous thing I see is The Lady of Shallot by Waterhouse and nothing else there I've ever seen before (except on a doco about the Turner Monet Whistler exhibition on TV a few days before). Mostly Turners and Constables and various paintings from the 1500s to 1900s. All rather lovely; lots dealing with greek mythology which is right up my alley at the moment. Then off to the Modern part of Tate Britain in which I despise every single piece of work there. I just cant see beyond the shit which most of this stuff is. I'm not quite sure what this says about me as I usually love modern art but I put it down to two things. 1. All the great modern art MUST be at Tate Modern and 2. this stuff can hardly compare with beautiful landscapes and portraiture spanning the last 400 years in which Id previously been immersed.

It is absolutely *$#?ing freezing today and bloody raining and so I freeze all the way home, am currently freezing AT home because these two insist on having a window ('the' window) open 24/7.

Then we watch some DVDs, everyone is whinging at me for watching too much TV so I wont tell you what... *smile*.

Thurs - 7th April

Discovering I was again out of reading material I decided to join the library. I got out seven books of varying genres to tide me over for three weeks all for 5p (the cost of the bag to carry them in). Gotta love free stuff. Then I went on a secret mission along Kensington High Street, so secret even I didnt know what it was. So I bought another book (I must be stopped!) and decided I hated the man in the bookstore who served me. I arrived home feeling much more worse for wear than when I left the house for no good reason at all and swiftly got straight to more reading. Now Im reading Catch 22 (funnily enough). It's odd indeed.

Wed 6 April

I was up to two thirds of the way through my book today which is always far too compelling a place to be to discard it for other adventures so I read until I was finished and then sat around dejectedly wondering what to do next. So I read every piece of reading material I could find in the house and then went and bought some magazines and read all of those until it was sleep time.

Tue April 5

Another late start (damn addictive book), but at least the sun is out. I jump on the Tube to Tower Hill to spend the afternoon at the Tower of London. Take lots of pictures as its quite pretty but most of the exhibitions are re-creations and any sense of history has been washed away by the floods of tourists. I make my way around as best I can with the map in German I accidentally picked up (I really am clueless) and finally get the chance to answer the question I fondly asked often as a kid (how many jewels in the Queen's crown? A - Too bloody many to count. No wonder I never got a sufficient answer). A little bit of the history is lost on me and I should have got an audio tour but the £14.50 to enter seemed quite enough to go frivolously spending any more. The most interesting things are the armour (fattest, tallest and a variety of children's armour as well as the very fancy horse armour.) About the most impressive thing I see is the chopping block where Simon Fraser was beheaded (as featured in Diana Gabaldon novels) and graffiti as written around the 1500s. Afterwards I walk over the Tower Bridge and hoorah back again headed for home.

Have a great dinner as made by ME - I swear the vegetables here, particularly the pumpkin and potato taste much better.

Then netcafe for my own interest's sake for a change rather than the endless job searching (research on toy shops and libraries). And THEN on the way home some guy stops me in the street for a chat and asks me to go to the pub. Luckily I have to go and let Shane in the house so he gives me his card and asks me to call him tomorrow. I swear when accosted by strangers the nagging cynical voice in my head shuts down and I become little miss friendly. Anyway, afterwards when miss cynical kicks in again I decide to throw out the card and imagine him walking off and continuing the procedure with every lone female walking along minding their own business. Chances are, a few days from now he'll spot me somewhere and demand to know why I never called and hence why I have avoided the netcafe for a few days.

Mon April 4

Becoming a bit sick of these overcast, cold, rainy days. Although they do predict sleet over the weekend which sounds quite fun. However, I guess too many sunny days wouldn't suit the place at all and I start to contemplate us poor cousins shipped off to Australia and out of the way. Although I have nothing to offer from that train of thought although it amused me for quite some time this morning.

Peruse TNT mag and read some of my latest book (Time Travellers Wife which has become highly addictive despite my desire to dislike it at first - a lot of this having to do with a number of similarities to Diana Gabaldon's books).

Force myself to visit the Bureau De Chnage (bloody hell they charge a lot don't they) and the net-non-cafe for an action packed three hours of job hunting and rating of job websites. Thank god for my IPOD at times such as these.

They're running these '50 greatest...' shows at the moment and tonight's topic is moments in children's TV. God knows why but I'm starting to love these shows. Britain seriously has the shittst dramas ever seen but they certainly make up for it with their comedies. Tonight's inclusion of Rik Mayall and NKOTB are the highlights. God I'm boring.

Debate whether to travel to Windsor for the Royal Wedding and in the end I decide against it cos I hate them both and wouldn't have a clue how to get there even if I wanted to. Plus, they've moved it to a Saturday which will ultimately just draw a larger crowd. Although some part inside me is still somewhat keen. If there was a promise of a beer with Prince Harry I'd definitely be there to witness that ticking timebomb in action. But, hell, if the Queen can't be bothered, neither can I.

Hello to the person reading over my shoulder.

Sun Apr 3

Bahrain GP is on so Shane vows not to leave the house and I spend my morning plotting out what to do and see next week cos I'm sick of sitting around the house (or room as it were). Off to the Laundromat (Tip #? don't dry synthetics), the shops and later on the netcafe.

The weather is perfect today.

Damn sick of hearing Natalie Imbruglia's new song (they love her here) and this re-release of 'Is This The Way To Amarillo' by Tony Chrisite inspired by a film clip of some British comedian (Peter Kaye I think) miming along to it whilst walking down the road with various other recognisable English celebs. It's become huge which is an odd little phenomena.

Am reading a book a week at the moment and starting to think spending all this money on books is unwise (will research the library system unless anyone can offer me some advice) and also, can anyone recommend some good stuff to read. Thinking about getting into English lit but we shall see.

Sat, April 2

Just so you know, as I went to post this the update failed so yay I have to type it all out again.

Today we stuff around all morning, or more accurately, Shane does with me trying to inspire him into action. Eventually we board the tube bound for Camden Markets. These markets are great with the largest clientele being goths and punks. But as usual the place is packed and we swear to come back on a weekday. I can't shop at the best of times let alone when a place is choc full of the "cool people".

Shane is keen to buy t-shirts so we check out this store selling roughly 100 or so different designs. We browse around for ages and there was this Home Alone shirt with the classic picture of Macauley Culkin expressing surprise or whatever the hell that emotion's supposed to be. I'd sort of glanced at it a bunch of times but being a familiar image I chose to ignore it, but upon realising it was an odd design to include in this kind of shop I took a closer look and realised they'd superimposed a scary picture of Michael Jakson peeking through the window at him. I swear I laughed for a good ten minutes with tears and all which was rather embarrassing. So Shane said 'if it's that funny I'm going to buy it' and he did. This caused various outbursts of laughter for the rest of the day.

We drop by the bakery on the way home and spend the evening watching a couple of romantic comedies (both with 10 in the title) borrowed from his brother Craig whilst feeding on pizza. My quota for romance movies for the year is now full (or should I say, truly exceeded its limit). And you know what, as I write this Shane puts on 'Wimbledon' *sigh*.

Fri, April 1

Today I did absolutely nothing (except play GTA) so let's just write this one off shall we?

Thu, March 31

I have to drop my application into Virgin today so I figure I'll take myself on a tour in the process. So I take a stroll through Kensington Gardens, past Kensington Palace (which I figure for entry at £11 is worth a miss) Walk around the 'round pond' (creative name) and try to find the Peter Pan statue (looking at the map now I realise the gardens are about 10 times bigger than I thought which is really rather large). Instead I find the Albert Monument which is both garish and striking.

It's easy to see, walking through this park, why this country is surrounded by mysticism (which ironically has a lot to do with all the mist, in my opinion). I exit across from the Royal Albert Hall and am blown away for about the hundredth time today by this city's amazing architecture. (I'm also really astounded that instead of getting lost by now I've actually ended up where I intended to be.) Having said that, at this point I get lost momentarily but discover the Royal Ballet and University of Arts which isn't a total loss.

Walk past the National History and Science Museums and decide to spend my afternoon in the Victoria and Albert Museum. At first I find it small and unmoving until I finally find a map and realise how wrong I was. I start off looking at the Asian Galleries and onto a small portion of the Renaissance Galleries. I become awed in the 'Cast Court Rooms' which are basically two very large rooms devoted to plaster casrs of doorways, sculptures, tombs and towers and this stuff is huge! Luckily, it's in this room I discover you can take photographs (hooray!) The room is filled with people making sketches. There's even a cast of David which is about 3 times bigger than I imagined (the whole statue damnit).

I then check out the Photography exhibit and onto the two rooms (out of 145 mind you) that I accidentally paid £10 to see (no one told me most museums were bloody free). This exhibit is International Arts and Carfts which is actually pretty cool. Furniture design from the 1900s (which is bizarrely incredibly contemporary) with re-creations of rooms in typical houses for the period. Quite cool, but it's about this time I'm a bit over it.

But, whilst having lunch I discover a whole floor devoted to the 20th century and paintings so I perservere. There's some really cool stuff in the modern gallery. Progressions in design, technology and furniture in the last 100 years. But I decide in the paintings gallery that its art galleries and not museums which I like best. Paul Nash and John Constable have found a new fan in me. I even see one of the most amazing paintins I've seen, as done by a 16 year old.

Then I drag my legs through the sculpture, ironwork (with some great tin toys, musical instruments, fashion, portrait miniatures, silver and Raphael exhibitions until I decide I've had enough. Figure I've seen about half of what's to offer! But damnit, I missed the British Galleries and architecture among heaps more. Ohhh well.

So I walk home (and pray I'm heading in the right direction) to rest my weary eyes and legs. Spot Alfred Hitchcock's house and duck as I walk past, but at least I'm in the right place. Hooray!

Wed, March 30

Another afternoon searching for jobs at the netcafe. Get an email from the Production Assistant job I applied for before I left Australia (the only job I've seen that I really wanted so far). Apparently I'm among 30 people to be shortlisted (um, yay) but they've delayed choosing anyone as they're undergoing some company restructuring or some such bollocks. I apply for a few others which I'm entirely unsuited for but hell, why not. Drop in an application to the video store and was told I'd hear between 10 days and a month based on if there are any positions available. (Well why is there an ad in your window then?!?)

Head home and play some GTA:SA (which was a big mistake as now I'm hooked on it again) until Shane gets home. Then we continue our evening tradition of laughing at the stupidest things for far too long (as only Joel can best understand).

Jamie Oliver is the country's hero here at the moment. I'm not sure if you're hearing about this in Australia. If not, basically he does a show called Jamie's School Dinners where he travels to schools endeavouring to make their meals healthier, which is actually way more interesting than it sounds. Now the Government, based on Jamie's whinging, has decided to increase funding for healthier school lunches. Nice to see celebs, even annoying ones, working towards the greater good.